Indian Marriage. I Have Accepted Many Things In This Country But This … This Is A Big Surprise For Me

Friday. Work. I am sitting and looking through a calendar. Suddenly, I realize that it’s been almost two months already as I live in India.

Do I miss Kazakhstan? – Of course, I do, especially I miss my family and friends. I miss that time when my family and I were going on the shore of the Caspian Sea, making barbecue, setting up the tent and swimming in the sea. We were doing it almost weekly. I also miss moments, when I rode my bicycle along streets of Almaty, met friends in new parts of the city. And I did that almost daily.

Do I want to come back? – Not yet

One evening after the work, I and Friday (my friend from Africa) were hitchhiking. Every time we had different companions and each with their own life story, and they shared them with us very gladly. I will tell you about one of those.

Marriage by agreement. He is 29, she is 27, and they tied the knot of marriage. About half a year ago, completely unknown to each other, they made up their resumes, which they sent to different families. Both sides received back about 5-6 resumes in reply, which had a little information about age, education, a little bit about family, workplace, salary and hobbies. The guy has chosen only 3 from those 5-6 resumes. To begin with, he met each girl privately, in order to get to know each other better. He did that 3-4 times, something like short dates. Then, if he and she liked each other, it’s parent’s turn. And that is not all. If parents from both families have liked each other, the next step is analysis from a neutral person, who knows both families, knows their social status. After a short analysis, this person gives his/her permission for marriage.

Indian Wedding

Marriage costs may be shared differently, it depends on a situation. Back in the days and even now, marriages in many cultures are celebrated in a big way, grand style – couple invites all relatives, friends, colleagues, basically everyone they know. But modern families are a bit more calm and shy in this terms. The bride was wearing jeans and a T-shirt, as well as the groom. And there were not so many people.

Hindu people think that after a marriage it is better to live separately from their parents, because a larger portion of newly married couples, who lived with brides’ or groom’s parents, end up their life in marriage with divorce. In order to prevent that, our companion lives with his spouse in other city.

Birth of a child is a great happiness. But in India, the government does not support that little miracle. After the birth of first child, a girl should make a surgery in order to not to have another baby. In this case, government thanks family for stopping the process of reproduction and therefore pays 3000 rupees which is around 50 dollars.

I have accepted many things in this country, it’s culture and upbringing. But this… this is a big shock for me.

And I think, no, I am sure, that these are those types of stories I came for to India.

Many people still ask me, why India? – Because here, in such places as India, one can really learn to appreciate things we have, our story and background, culture and traditions of the great nation. And after that, you can be proud of your Motherland, be proud of the sky-blue flag, huge country and culture of our ancestors.

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